I’m an anxious person, I always was and though I’ve worked on my anxiety, I accept I may always be. It fluctuates, but it is always there ready to raise it’s ugly head.

Art has always been a anxiety fix. I’m just happy making. I have always filled my time with creative outlets, basket weaving, drawing, miniatures, carving, painting, wood burning and of course ceramics – to name a few. Even redecorating a room, being creative in anyway, the process calms me. Makes me happy. Brings me peace. As life’s responsibilities occupied my life more and I became a mother there was a direct correlation between my anxiety rising and my lack of creative time. I wasn’t healing myself.

With all the joy making art gives me, it’s ironic that the thought of making art gives me anxiety, the act calms, the thought of presenting it to the world, well that’s another story. The fear of failure, that is why it has taken me years to start what I should have done by now. I’m anxious, but I’m also hopeful, starting my studio, working towards a goal to one day be self sustaining on my art. I’m working towards that and though I may struggle, have anxious sleepless nights, the joy making brings me is reason enough to believe I can do this. I want to show my children, myself, that I’m stronger than my anxiety.

So here I am, eager to try, eager to learn and ready to overcome the anxiety that has held me back. I want the joy. I will focus on the joy.